Chairman Mao the Burmese Cat

Ridiculously handsome, of superior intelligence, and capable of stalking and killing the most fearsome moths in the world, I shall blog my incredibly interesting adventures from all over my Melbourne townhouse, just for you. I'm into reciprocal grooming, so link me and I'll link you back.

Monday, January 16, 2006

I havest a Meme!

I have hadst a meme is thrown at me!

Lucy the simian who is owned by a nice cat called Baz has done this thing. I know not what it is, or why it is? But I will try and do it, because I likest to be loved, and also because I am mad as a cat in a hell full of dogs and needs distractmuss, and also because then maybe Lucy or Baz will linkst me and thereby show me love.

I musts say the 5 wierdest things that what I do!

*cocks head*

*right ear goes back*

*right ear comes forward*

That is number one. Wants to see it again? Scroll up 6 lines.

Now what is else is there? I am not wierd at all, because I am beautiful and smart. But I know what my simians find wierd, I shall share it, on the assumption that you will all bring me salmon.

Number two.... well, see I see a bird and I lookst at the bird and I bravely do this fearsome and scary and brave, did I mention brave? thing which is whats that I utter a sounds like an outboard motor on a boat- whatever that is, ask baldy, and I dislocates my lower jaw, and my lower jaw goes ins and outs real fast while I make the noise.
"naga- naga- naga-naga- naga-naga- naga-naga- naga-naga- naga-naga- naga naga- naga-naga- naga-naga- naga-naga- naga-naga- naga-naga- naga-naga-naga-naga- naga-naga- naga-naga- naga-!!"
That's it- cool is it not?

Number three... I gets on the couch and I licks baldy's head. I knows cats does this, even when 'tis not reciprocuss, buts I do it and do it and do it and if baldy didst not stop and shift I would lick his head off! My tongue its is like a cheese grater!

Number four... I write a blog. I'm a cat, it is, I am told, exceptionally wierd.

And number fives.... well, I complain and complain thats I want more company and I mewl and look longingly at other cats what it is walks around my house but if you put one anywhere near me I GO &*%*&% PSYCHO AND I WANTS TO KILL IT WHY DOESN'T IT SHUT UP WHY DOES ITSMELL LIKE OTHER THAN WHAT I IS WHY IS IT HERE WHY DO THEY NOT LOVE ME I AM GOING TO KILL SOMETHING OR AT LEAST DO THE NAGA-NAGA AT IT OH I DON'T CARE ABOUT SALMON ANY MORE I JUST WANTS THE PLACE TO MYSELF AGAIN.

WHAT ARE YOU STARING AT?!?!?!?!

...

Sorry, I'm upsets.

That is all. I must go hiss at a door.

2 Comments:

  • At 8:22 pm, Blogger Pavlov's Cat said…

    Wow.

    That was some tanty.

    Ask baldy and longhair if they ever used to watch a nice TV show about animals called All Things Great and Small. There was a lady in it with a little dog and every now and then the little dog would go crazy (barking, heh) and his simian would call it 'going cracker-dog'.

    You went cracker-cat, Mao. Big-time. Hope you are a calm cat again. How is the little fluffball, or would you rather not be asked?

     
  • At 11:21 pm, Blogger Princess Cleo said…

    That calls for a major bitey session followed by a Simultaneous Hind Leg Kick of Death!

     

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